Putting the Romance Back in Your Spiritual Life

For your Maker is your husband — the LORD Almighty is his name.
Isaiah 54:5a


As a counselor I sometimes tell starry-eyed couples that romantic love isn’t real. Perhaps that’s a bit of an exaggeration because love certainly is a real feeling, but it’s no more illuminating than the world seen through a bottle of Johnny Walker Red. Romantic love has chemical and emotional components which change the way we assess priorities and consequences. In love our maturity level slips backward to that of a teenager. We ignore danger. We glorify the imperfect. We idealize the unknown. We absolutely know we are going to live happily ever after!


Strangely enough, the same dynamic seems to happen when we fall in love with God. How many of us – if we are honest and brave enough to say it – have been disappointed with Him? How many of us would say that it isn’t all going the way we planned, that it’s harder than we thought, that God doesn’t always hold up His end of the bargain?


Of course, there really is no bargain. What we have is a done deal – God agreed to die for our sins, and we agreed to live for His righteousness. That’s it. Savior and Lord. For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health… well, you get the idea. It sounds very sweet when you say it in church, looking like a model, holding your best friend’s hand. It seems a bit different in the drudgery of everyday frustrations, the despair of bankruptcy, the challenges of addiction, the weariness of long illness, life lived alongside someone you aren’t even sure you like anymore.


If faithfulness is difficult to maintain with a visible, warm-blooded spouse, it can be even more difficult when your Spouse lives in a Paradise you’ve never actually seen. One thing we can know, however; with a human partner, there is sin on both sides. While we don’t understand a lot of God’s ways, there is no sin in Him. All His acts toward us, even unanswered prayers and unforeseen disasters, are meant for our good (Rom. 8:28). That’s where faith comes in and where faithfulness finds its biggest challenges.


In a marriage there are ways to deal with those challenges other than running away. For example, you might try being a little more honest with your partner, sharing your disconnection or even your anger with them. You might talk to a pastor or a counselor or a trusted friend. You might attempt to rekindle your romance by spending more time with your lover, writing them amorous notes and reading some of theirs, reviewing the history of your relationship or taking up new interests together. You might examine your own sin as you deal with your disappointment. You might work at knowing and loving the person who is, rather than the person you made up in your head when you were ‘under the influence.’


These same remedies are applicable to our relationship with God. Go back and read the last paragraph from that perspective. And then ask yourself, will you love God when He isn’t what you thought He was? When He doesn’t do what you want Him to do? When He doesn’t treat you the way you want to be treated? It’s what you promised when you gave Him your heart. If you’ve lost your first love, then things are getting real. Your Maker is your Husband, and He will never leave you nor forsake you. How will you keep your love alive?

Please reply in the COMMENT section.  I’d love to hear some of your ideas.